Alchemy's Price
by SONICPHENG
Summary: Eliza Elric, first daughter of the Elric household ignores her father's warnings on the use of alchemy in an attempt to find a place to belong. Making the mistake of teaching it to Rex Mustang, a hooligan, she visits him in the city after a year of separation and they fall into the circumstances of terrorism, committing a taboo that will never be forgiven. -M for graphic violence.
1. Introduction

It was when that incident occurred that my father's warnings came back to me.

"Alchemy is a science not to be messed with," my father answered the question of a gullible five-year-old. "it shouldn't be taken lightly-or even at all."

"But daddy, you were an alchemist once yourself, right?" With his hands holding me carefully atop his knee, my father, who was the strongest man in my eyes had a glint of something forlorn in his own. Something that I, even as a five year old could sense.

But he only smiled, supposedly because he understood I was at a learning age.

"I was. But listen carefully to daddy, Eliza. When people achieve power, whether it's the person with the power or not, someone will always be greedy. Having power can tempt anyone to make bad decisions with it."

I blinked, eagerly waiting for a finish.

"One bad decision can cost you your life, or worse, someone else's." His strong palms bumped me against his abdomen. "Daddy loves you too much, Eliza. That's why…"

"... Promise to never use alchemy."

But I was a rebel. Fate practically tattooed being difficult to raise from birth in me. It wasn't like I was mean or meant to hurt others-I was simply just too curious for my own good. Anything I got my hands on I'd pull apart at the seams just to dissect what it was made of and how it was put together.

Putting it back was a bit harder, however. Building and fixing was my little brother's specialty, Abel Elric.

To be honest, I felt out of place growing up; pushed out of proportion from the rest. I had the hair and eyes of my mother, and my father always commented on how I resembled our deceased grandmother sometimes in the face, but other than the scariness of genetics, I had nothing going for me.

My eldest brother, Allen, went off to the city to train in special forces at only fourteen. My younger brother, Abel, could tinker closely to my mom's level at a young age, and Ivy, my youngest sister, had the harmonious voice of an angel as well as a love for all things living. I wrote in a journal to pass the time, but I wasn't even that great at writing. I had nothing to make me… Me. Even Rex, my best friend was gifted in agility and physical relations.

Until I met him. A traveling man in the woods of Resembool with hair as ebony as a precious stone. He greeted me with a smile, and meeting him would be my first encounter with alchemy itself.

I often spent time at my uncle's house to seek advice and reassurance when I fell into a depression. It was good for me to get another's outlook and opinion whenever I thought my parents hated me for the trouble I got into. Uncle Al was kind and always listened carefully to my troubles. Until one day I had it with who I was, and I made the risky decision to run away.

I had no provisions to aid me on my journey, as I darted out the door on an impulse. It was just me, the clothes on my back and the rumbling of an approaching storm towards my nine-year-old self. The rain began to pour, and quickly, I became drenched and encased in a vicious suit of shivering cold. I had walked and ran for three hours to get as far away as possible-I was already out of my sorts from a developing cold.

But I couldn't go back. I genuinely thought I was the worst of all.

That was when the reflection of square glasses gleamed into my attention. I was greeted by a young individual. He had gentle eyes the color of a grey-ish blue, with thick, curly black hair that had been deemed impossible to perfectly tame. Under my dire need of medical attention, he took me into his small hut.

And introduced to me the one thing I was never allowed to learn.

Alchemy.

For three days, he sheltered me in his little wooden house. The first day he treated my cold, the second he taught me my first transmutation.

"Focus your mind," he started, standing behind my wary self and holding my hands in his own. "Imagine the atoms shifting-forming into a replica of the horse shoe you see before you."

My eyes wavered, and my heart thumped louder and louder. I was a curious child. My curiosity caused trouble. Yet I knew that by doing this I would directly disobey my father…

… But what was so bad about alchemy? If I knew how to perform transmutation, I could actually be someone. I could feel special, and apart of something.

That feeling was worth it to me. I followed his instruction and clapped my hands together; the world instantly becoming one with my mind and body. With a press against my circle I worked hours to draw to perfection, the pile of aluminum screws laying atop it with a surge of power bursted in light. A clang to the wooden table before me had me wearily peel open a lid.

There it was.

A perfectly shaped aluminum horseshoe.

For the first time, I felt my spirit become uplifted. Something wondrous mystified me, yet left me starstruck with excitement. I found something I could do, and so easily, too. I had thought alchemy was a piece of cake-nothing like how hard I heard the rumors say it was.

The concern only flooded in at the sensation of his hands shaking over mine.

I traced my eyes upward. He wore a confused expression, as if something nearly impossible just happened.

"... Extraordinary."

For the rest of that day, he continued to teach me the laws and physics of alchemy. I had never been so alive and interested in something in my life. I wanted to be an alchemist. I felt it was my destiny.

Then day three came. With instructions on how to find material on alchemy, he sent me off back to Resembool to face my most definite worried-driven family, and possibly the rest of the small village. It wasn't long that I was found with spine crushing embraces and the harshest scoldings I would ever experience. But I was changed. I hid the horseshoe in my cargo pants pocket.

In secret, I pursued alchemy behind their backs.

My studies were low key, and I strived to become better and better strictly within the rules so that I would make no fatal mistakes. I nearly escaped being caught on a few occasions. I could never imagine what my father would do or say if he discovered my hand in such a forbidden art. Disobeying him after him and my uncle told their story so many times… But I couldn't stop, and with the discovery of all types of alchemy, I did something unforgivable.

I taught Rex my knowledge upon being begged, and instead of being my secret, it became our secret. With that secret, we committed a taboo that would ruin our lives forever.

It was when that incident occurred that my father's warnings came back to me.

Then started the beginning of the end of my everything.


	2. Chapter 1

"That's…"

I bit my lip while staring at his bewildered expression. It was expected, especially after I had been caught, but nobody was supposed to know-not even him.

But he implored for answers, and so I showed him in secret.

"That's amazing!"

I blinked, not sure how to absorb this response.

"Rex, are you really surprised? Your dad is the Flame Alchemist. He's the _Führer_."

"And your dad is one of the greatest alchemist researchers, yet you still keep this a secret from him."

I glared at that smug expression cornering me. I was nailed within the span of two minutes we were sitting in this room. I would contemplate how the heck he found me and how I didn't notice him following behind, but Rex was the sneakiest of them all, so I pushed it aside.

"Promise you won't tell. He'll kill me."

"-Why?" _Uhg_ -he was starting to ask questions. I could never keep anything to myself when he was around. "Your uncle and father's discoveries are incredible. If you were my kid and could do something like this, I'd be proud."

A sigh escaped my lips. I had taken my father's reasoning into consideration more than a few times, and I understood it. He was trying to protect us from making mistakes and being overcome with power. Specifically me, since I had almost no restraint when it came to my curiosity.

I wanted to be something, and one day I wanted to prove I was responsible enough to handle alchemy.

Rex sighed back at my silence and folded his arms. "Hey,"

I lifted my eyes to face him.

"teach me, too."

I heard the first tear of our future the moment he said that.

And I chose to ignore it.

* * *

I was on the floor. I could tell because my metal bed post was inches from my cheek, and the ceiling was clear before my eyes. But how had I gotten there? I didn't even remember falling asleep to begin-

A forced tug pulled a sheet from under my back. I smacked my nose into the bed post with a yelp.

"Get up, lazy! Mom's been calling us for dinner!"

I turned to look at a dirty blonde with short locks and bright blue eyes. Abel stared back at me with the sheet gripped tightly in his gloves.

Oh.

That's how I got there.

I rubbed my nose with an attempt to sit myself up, wondering whatever happened to the times when he was a delicate kid. "You could have just shook me…"

"You didn't think I tried?" He placed his hands on his hips with a short breath. "You've become such a heavy sleeper lately. Mom and dad are getting worried."

They'd be even more worried if they knew _why_ I was sleeping so heavily. My chest felt heavy, and I could feel dark circles forming under my eyes. Pursuing alchemy was important to me, but was hardly possible during the day when everyone was awake. Everyday of study was a two hour walk at night to a small abandoned building, undoing traps to the basement, working all night, then walking back before anyone noticed I had been gone.

Abel shifted his lips to the side, a quirk I recognized as 'worry' whenever he did it. He crouched in front of me. "Seriously, what are you doing? It's almost night time and you're sleeping."

I gasped. Had I fallen asleep for that long? I only intended to take a five minute nap… Then again, he had said 'dinner' upon my rude awakening.

"Are you sure you're not having insomnia or something?" He swiped a thumb under my eye and then pulled for a moment. "Look at these bags-If I wasn't your brother, I'd think you're older than fifteen."

I smacked his hand away, now rubbing the skin he pulled instead of my nose. "Right away with the abuse, I see."

"Call it retribution," he stood, "for all of the times you 'gently' woke me up."

It was then I started questioning whether his sarcastic wit and sass came from me. I pouted, surprised when he stretched a hand out to me.

"Let's go. You can lean on me if you want."

I felt the pain in my face vanish when I saw him. Even through that wall of sass, he would always still be kind-hearted and caring. It wasn't hard for me to admit that I was proud to be his older sister.

But as I took his hand… I wondered if he could ever say the same about me.

He pulled me with a strong grip, helping me to my feet. "I can walk, thank you."

His body was already starting to get stronger, and he was probably half an inch taller than me. When I thought about it, his voice had started getting deeper, too. Soon, he would surpass me as well. The most shocking thing is that he resembled Uncle Al more and more as the days dragged on.

Except Uncle Al was much nicer.

Abel squeezed my hand, staring at it intensely as if trying to find something. Maybe he already did. Abel wasn't only intelligent with robotics, but he applied the same talent to the structure of the human body. He could see everything. Something told me he was seeing how my fatigue had been really affecting me.

When I realized what he had been doing, I pulled my hand away from him and used it to brush my blonde locks out of my face. "Take your gloves off. No work gear at the table, remember?"

I brushed passed him, but could feel him staring into the back of my neck. This was one trait I disliked about my family. It was filled with geniuses and sharp eyes.

Hiding wasn't an option with these relatives. And they have been becoming more and more suspicious as of late. It wouldn't be long before I'll be caught.

Through the door and down the stairs wafed the smell of cornbread, chickpea stew with beef and baked bread, ready to be cut and buttered. Only mom's cooking could cure my impending nausea from sleep deprivation, but knowing that I wouldn't get away with sneaking dinner to my room after that long 'nap', I began to feel stiff at whatever confrontation I'd have to face.

And around the corner, there she was. The kitchen was a room with counters aligned on the back wall and a large wooden table set nicely at the center, a light suspended over it and a white tablecloth with probably a few hidden stains from some messy childlike eaters placed nicely over it. She was finishing setting the table with Ivy, and my youngest brother who was only four, Cullen, was running around with a toy in his hand, making noises with his mouth as he energized the room simply by being in it.

A small smirk played on my face until Abel pushed me from out of the shadow and into the kitchen. Before I could glare, I locked eyes with her, the iron woman of all households.

Winry Rockbell. Otherwise known as Mrs. Elric.

"There you are, Liz! I haven't seen your face in hours. What were you doing?"

"Pulling apart the fundamentals of existence in pursuit of life's meaning."

"She was asleep. _Again_." Interjected Abel-even after I answered so gracefully. He stuffed his work gloves in his cargo pants, but was stopped before even looking at a chair to sit in.

"Uh-uh. Go wash your hands. I don't want my freshly baked bread tasting like metal and oil."

He clicked his tongue and headed for the sink. "Right, right."

Just when I thought the conversation went elsewhere and I tried to grab a seat, she stopped me too, with crossed arms; one holding a butter knife. It didn't help in my self comfort.

"You stop, too, young lady. Your hair is hanging in your face. I have a hair tie if you need one, but please keep it out of your face when eating. It'll get in your food."

I would admit that my hair was very long, thick, and hard to keep up with. It was also parted to the side and my bangs fell over and around my eyes, which is what I intended to begin with. I pulled a hair tie off of my wrist and pulled it back into a sloppy ponytail.

I met her groaning eyes. A smell floated from the stove.

"Abel,"

"I got it."

The communication between my family was also impressive. With that he began pulling a desert out of the stove, and my mother started fixing my hair.

"Want to tell me why you haven't been sleeping?"

I swallowed.

"I don't follow."

She pursed her lips, lifting my head up with her fingertips. "I'm not blind, you know. I can see circles under your eyes."

I stood corrected. Abel got his sass from mother.

"I'm okay, mom."

"No, you're not." She grabbed the plate in front of me and started preparing my food for me-probably as a way to continue conversation so that I would have no excuse not to respond. "You're father and uncle are coming back tonight from their business trip in Xing. You _know_ he's going to ask the minute he sees you."

The memory of him catching me trying to sneak out a couple of years back stung at that moment. My father and uncle were brilliant researchers-surely if I asked one of them to teach me alchemy and state my reason, they would listen. But I was too scared of what would happen if I did. Because alchemy wasn't just alchemy at this point.

It was an addiction. The hairs stood on my arms even admitting that mentally.

"I bet she hasn't even packed yet." Abel placed a steaming fresh cherry pie on the table next to the neatly cut loaf of bread. I stopped at the word 'packed' just as I was to grab a slice of my own.

"Packed?"

I was a slow learner, so when my mother looked at me with a strike of befuddlement, I wished I could yank my repeated word back. I was not my biggest helper.

Abel gave me a playful smack upside the head.

Probably so that mother wouldn't have to.

"Are you still asleep? We're going to visit Allen tomorrow at Central City. You should write him back more often."

Abel grabbed the slab of bread I was reaching for and proceeded to butter it for me in front of my unresponsive self.

"Open."

I did. He placed it in my mouth.

But how could I have forgotten we were leaving tomorrow? Was I simply losing track of the days?

Considering I slept at irregular hours, my lack of time perception wasn't shocking. I bit down and chewed slowly, savoring the taste of a delicious piece of the loaf, but unable to fully enjoy it.

A small hand touched my leg where I sat. I turned to the source and looked down upon bright hair and bright golden eyes.

"Sissy, does it hurt somewhere?"

Cullen, my adorable baby brother who already had aspirations to build houses and constructions gazed upon me with uncertain eyes. How large they were was sometimes ridiculous, but irresistible and easily pain numbing. I smiled and ran my fingers through his silky hair.

"Sissy is fine, just really tired."

"Eliza,"

I turned to mom's concerned tone of voice.

"you know if something is wrong you can tell me and dad, right? I know you've had trouble in the past, especially with struggling to find yourself, but you don't have to shoulder your uncertainties alone."

My lips pursed. I actually thought about what she was saying carefully. I was tired, and I had been hiding my unique alchemical talents and self taught knowledge for years now… Maybe it was time to confess. Maybe there had been no reason for me to be scared.

If I had told my parents what was wrong, maybe I wouldn't be in so much pain and conflict anymore.

There was a knock across the house. Cullen leapt away from my hand and bolted the moment he heard it, and Ivy giggled, closely following behind. "Daddy's home!"

Abel suddenly put down the plate of food he had been preparing and his eyes lightened up. He too with excitement ran towards the front of the house. Everyone was dying to see them-a natural response for someone being gone for two weeks, yet I was stuck in my seat.

"Aren't you going to greet your father?"

"Yeah, I'll be there in a second." I could argue that I wanted to jump and see him the most, but half of me didn't want him to see my plummeted appearance. It was most definite that I had looked even gloomier than when he left. The buildup of keeping secrets… Losing sleep over a rebellious goal…

… I felt too ashamed to face him.

She paused, but decided to leave with them. I pulled my hair out of the updo, inhaled as hard as possible and went to meet them. Hiding wasn't a possibility-he'd want to see me too eventually.

"Daddy, welcome home!"

"Hey, squirt!" Dad happily took the tackle from Cullen into his arms. "How's my strong man doing? Been taking care of the family while I was gone?"

"Yep!"

"Welcome back, dad!" and then in came Abel, happy as the rest. Ivy was jumping with joy beside him. One by one, he skillfully pulled them all into his arms. Even mom gave him a good embrace and a kiss upon seeing him. From the shadowed out corner I carefully watched from, a small smile crept onto my face. I wanted to jump in, but my previous thoughts glued my feet to the wooden flooring.

And then came in my uncle Al. He too became bombarded. I swallowed in nervousness.

"Hey, where's my big girl?" said my father.

I sweat.

"Right here, daddy!"

"Yes, you're my big girl, but I mean my _big_ , big girl." Dad pinched her nose with a chuckle. "Where's Liz?"

'Now or never.' I encouraged myself with a puff of my chest. I was going to go out there, hug him, and be totally normal. I moved my foot forward with confidence,

And then he locked eyes with me and all sense of confidence broke.

He ran to embrace me before I even trekked halfway, squeezing my face into the familiar scent and fabric of his coat. In his arms, I didn't want to pull away, and I wondered why I continued to keep secrets from this man?

"I missed you, kiddo. How's my little Alice?"

As in Wonderland. Suitable for a kid as destructive as me, and if the question ever came up-yes, I would have jumped into the rabbit hole. Intentionally.

"I missed you, too."

"Alright, let me see your face."

I braced myself as his hands pushed my hair away from my eyes. It only took a couple of seconds for his brows to furrow when looking right at me.

The longer he looked, the worse it got. His wide grin unraveled itself, and I knew the realization was over my sleep deprived appearance. I blinked when his cold thumbs stroked under my eyes. I hadn't seen myself yet, but I knew about the bags, and I most definitely had some bloodshot eyes. I recognized his next expression.

It was the pained one that knew how to pin me down and diagnose me.

"Eliza, what are you hiding?"

I bit my tongue in an attempt to recover from being seen through. He looked back at mom. As if using some form of marriage telepathy, she started ushering my siblings out of the room. "Alright, kids, let's go help daddy make his food!"

The farther they left, the closer to being alone I was with him, and it was suffocating because I could predict what he might say.

"I'm not hiding anything." I tried beating him to the punch.

"You are. I can tell. When you start to feel guilty or self-loathing, you get insomnia. That's your body's reaction to those things."

"I was just up journaling a bit and lost huge track of time."

"And what did you write about that took hours to complete?" He said with a sterner tone. I felt my airflow cease. I must have been biting my lip in defeat, because he loosened the clamp with a brush of his thumb.

"Liz, you can talk to me."

I felt my eyes water. The feeling was bittersweet. I just wanted a place to belong. If I was just doing alchemy, maybe it would have been fine. But admitting the truth was hard. I knew it wasn't just alchemy anymore.

I was staying up to practice it. I threw important things away for alchemy.

It was starting to become a drug to me. An addiction to power and talent.

My eyes started to burn. I looked him in the eye.

"Dad," A metallic sounding from the kitchen made us jolt. It was followed up by happy cheering. A pair of footsteps entered our presence and we both looked. Uncle Al, as kind looking as ever, ducked in.

"We're about to start dinner, just letting you know."

"Yeah, Al. Just give us a minute-"

"Dad," I started again, lifting a hand to stop him. I pulled out of his grasp. "It's okay. You and uncle Al just came home, we can talk about this some other time."

And that was when a look of dissatisfaction fell on his face. He sighed, working up a smile and placing a hand on my back.

"I'm holding you to that promise."

The three of us joined the rest. The remainder of the night was filled with animation, rambunctious conversation and delight. After dinner, we sat around the table piled with empty plates and shared stories, exchanging laughs and joking comments. I'd momentarily forgotten about my fatigue and stress.

Then lateness hit. Uncle Al returned to his home, and everyone went to bed. I stayed up, packing my necessities into a large bag.

There was a knock. "I saw your light up; was wondering what you were doing."

"Abel." I whipped my head around. There was no time for me to say much else, as he was already getting comfortable on my mattress.

"You excited?"

I kept my focus on folding clothes. "For?"

"Going to Central City. You know Allen misses you-and don't forget Rex."

More like nervous. It had been too long the last time I saw that raven-haired troublemaker. "Of course I am."

Abel drew his eyes to my window. "You remember when we were little? I used to get nightmares a lot."

It was then I looked at him. He locked his gaze with mine and continued, "you'd stay up with me for nights at a time just to help me sleep. You look like how you did then, except…"

I felt strangulation in the air when he stopped. I was eager for an answer. "Except what?"

Worry wrinkled between his brows. His eyes dropped. "Except you're not smiling, like you're one going through the nightmare."

I felt something strike through my chest. I gripped the neatly folded shirt in my hands, only just now realizing how much my depression had been affecting the people I care about. A teardrop escaped, hitting the fabric.

"You need to stop being tough."

The silence filled with my silent crying.

"Abel."

"Yeah?"

A sense of pride washed over me, so I didn't finish. But he knew what I was thinking. He hopped off of my bed and headed for the door.

"I'll get my pillow."

I looked back at him. He reciprocated my look of uncertainty with confidence.

"If you're not sleeping, I may as well not. We can stay up, maybe talk about your writings or whatever crazy crap you wanna' do. We can sleep on the train tomorrow."

"Sorry-"

"Don't." He held his hand up, leaving once more. "I'll be right back."

It didn't take him long for Abel to return with an abnormally fat pillow, a lamp and even an assortment of snacks to keep us preoccupied for the night. It was the first I felt such a close connection with him since we were kids. We talked for hours, trying to stay quiet enough to keep our household in slumber.

This time, I didn't remember falling asleep, and it was fine.

* * *

The smell of plastic and metal flowed into my nostrils, and a sense of vision opened up before me. I was on a train, being shook awake by a gentle hand. I turned to see my father, waking me from my sleep.

"Eliza, we're here."

 _Here_?

I hadn't even remembered getting on the train. I was certainly dressed for the day. My hair was brushed, and my clothes had changed. My packed bag even sat beside me. A feeling of warmth rested on my shoulder. I turned to see Abel dead asleep on me.

"When did we even board?"

"Hours ago?" My dad chuckled. "You were dragging a little too much this morning-I'm not surprised you don't remember even dressing yourself."

"I must have been tired…"

He chuckled, giving me a light nudge. "Wake him up."

The rest of our family seemed to have just been waking up as well. With the train door opening up front, the cool air and smell of industrial city blew in. I looked out the window, and by the sudden shift from greenery to different shades of metal, I knew we had pulled into the heart of Central City.

We packed our things and blended in with the crowd of exiting passengers. I stepped onto the concrete, absorbing the metropolis within me once more. That was when the nervousness hit. We were finally going to see Allen, after so long of being apart. My big brother I cherished.

Well, there was him and-

"Liz?"

I inhaled sharply, carefully whirling towards the call.

There was Allen, and then there was the smile I was now looking at. He was dressed in leather, which matched his short raven locks. He wore an expression of happiness and surprise when I found him. I felt my chest thump.

"Rex."

* * *

 **A/N: HOPEFULLY THAT WAS A GOOD PLACE TO END. This chapter was particularly long, which is why it took me ten times longer to finish haaaa;;. Hope you babes enjoy this. Peace ; u ;~!**


End file.
